The Difference An "If" Makes

(Photo: MLKMemorial.org)

The Washington Post article by Rachel Manteuffel starts off with:

"The memorial to Martin Luther King Jr. has been a little controversial — but not for the right reason. Someone, somewhere along the line, made a decision that makes King look like something he was not: an arrogant jerk." 

This memorial was at least 14 years in the making so how could this possibly be? In summary the article goes on to discuss how a Martin Luther King Jr. quote destined for a prominent place on the memorial was morphed from its original:

"If you want to say that I was a drum major, say that I was a drum major for justice. Say that I was a drum major for peace.  I was a drum major for righteousness. And all of the other shallow things will not matter."

to this phrase now found there:

“I was a drum major for justice, peace and righteousness.”

A "drum major" is the leader of a band. It is someone that commands attention. But MLK was using this term in a pejorative way. He was referring to a drum major as someone who becomes a leader only to get attention. Unfortunately there are many self-centered "leaders" in this world like that. In the first and original quote MLK was basically saying that if you were a critic ready to accuse him of seeking out the limelight then fine, at least he did that for noble causes such as peace and justice.

In the final paraphrasing this meaning is lost. The new monument in Washington D.C. didn't have enough room for the full quote so the decision makers did some editing. Sadly by taking out the "if" clause it makes it sound like he'd declared himself the righteous leader for peace and justice. That does come off as arrogant and not even close to the original wording.

I bring up this story to make a point about how difficult good communication can be for anyone. If a 14 year effort can lead to monumental errors in wording what does that say for our day to day communication efforts in the work place or in home life?

What it says to me is threefold:

1. Always choose your words carefully - always! Don't get lazy. Better to be silent for a few seconds longer and package your message sensitively than risk a quick response that fails to deliver the proper message.
2. Be precise and give context when repeating the words of others. 
3. When someone else has made an error in communication be sympathetic because these errors happen to all of us - even those of us smart enough to be tasked with historic burdens such as communicating a great leader's thoughts and accomplishments to society.

One final, related note - here's a quote from Mr. King on communication which I espouse:

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."

- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Amen.